The Group You Should StartNow

The Group You Should StartNowThe Group You Should Start- NowYouve bought and read Lean In. Youve internalized Sheryl Sandbergs advice on not taking yur foot off the career brake until youre sure you want to, on the dos and donts of working with a mentor, and, of course, on taking a seat at the table. Youve renewed your commitment to yourself and your career. But have you seriously given thought to creating a Lean In circle, as she suggests?In 2012- yep, before Sandbergs book came out- a friend and I formed our own career group of 11 women in order to create a setting where we could share ideas, support, and resources. Our positions and fields are diverse- a partial list includes an entrepreneur, a nurse, a teacher, a creative director, two project managers, an architect, and a lawyer- and we range in age from 28 to 40. Our monthly meetings have helped us navigate salary negotiations, difficult conversations with co-workers, and growing into seniority, among many other topics. It has been an immensely satisfying experience that continues to help all of us as we navigate challenges and successes at our jobs- and one that Id recommend to anyone.If youve ever thought about starting a career group, here are the most important things Ive learned in the last 18 months.1. Go Outside Your Friend GroupSince a friend and I started our group, our first impulse was to invite all of our shared friends to join, too. But we quickly realized that we didnt want the group to only be friends who already knew each other well, so we extended invitations to friends of friends, acquaintances, and past colleagues. And were so glad we did As we learned, going outside of our immediate friend group helps keep the focus on specific issues or discussions (rather than personal catch up) and also diversifies the collective experience and perspective of the members.2. Set a Meeting ScheduleDuring the first few months of forming the group, we would schedule each meeting at a time over schmelzgl as. This worked to some degree, but it meant that meetings were irregularly spaced- anywhere from four to eight weeks apart- and between 11 people, there was always a lot of back and forth about scheduling.Eventually, we decided that having a set day and time was best, and we picked the second Wednesday of every month. This way, its a permanent fixture on everyones calendar, making scheduling simpler and ensuring we didnt accidentally go two months without meeting. We keep meetings to two hours and start and end promptly to be respectful of peoples busy schedules.3. Have a PlanIn order to make our time together valuable, every meeting is focused around a specific topic and run by one member. The structure of the meeting, and whether there is any assigned activity, homework, or reading, is up to that person. About a week prior, she will email everyone to remind them of the subject, explain what well be doing or reading, and confirm attendance.A typical meeting might start with a brie f round of updates followed by the main discussion. Some discussions are very freewheeling and loose during others well go around in a circle sharing one by one. Just recently weve started to discuss mixing up the format to keep things interesting and cover topics in new ways- for example, breaking up in to small groups to practice presentations or to role play negotiations. At the end of every meeting, we discuss what we want to cover at the next one and agree on who will lead it.4. Spread ResponsibilityWhen we first started our group, one woman always led the meetings. She did a fantastic job, but it meant that everyone else got to be comfortably passive, letting someone else be in control. Now, we all agree on a topic in advance, but switch who leads the meeting every month. This keeps everyone bought in and engaged with the topics and the larger purpose of the group. It also lets each person exercise her creativity (how do we want to structure the meeting? what reading do we wan t to ask people to do in advance?) and leadership skills.5. Keep Personal Updates ModeratedWhile our group is not composed entirely of close friends, weve all come to really like each other, and its easy to spend an entire hour- or more- chatting about things that have happened since the last time we met. And while we love the personal updates, we dont want them to take up all of our time, so we limit them to around three minutes per person. (We actually have someone watch the clock to keep things more or less on schedule)Another option is to have a limited number of people give updates and to give them a little longer to share, switching up who speaks each meeting. In order to satisfy our interest in plain old socializing, we occasionally meet for happy hours or other events separate from our monthly meetings as well.6. Ask People to CommitNo matter how much we all landsee the value in our career group, life intervenes- for everybody. Once people stop making most meetings or dont n otify the group if they cant attend, we tend to lose momentum and have less satisfying discussions.Initially, we didnt like the idea of taking attendance, but in order for the group to work, we have found that it works best to check in with group members every six months to a year. For people who just dont have time to show up reliably, this provides a comfortable way for them to bow out. For people who do want to continue being a part of the group, we ask for a reaffirmation of their commitment. For us this means Attending most meetings (we meet about 10 times a year) Letting people know if we cant make a meeting When its our turn to lead a meeting, we distribute any related readings or exercises a week in advance of the meeting date to give people time to prepare.Having a career group has been one of the best things I could have done for my confidence, excitement, and overall satisfaction about my career development and choices. If youre interested in forming your own group, hopef ully what Ive learned will help you get off on the right foot.Photo of women meeting courtesy of Shutterstock.